Day # 31



Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet has shed on the heel that has crushed it.

— Mark Twain

Forgiveness is one of the hardest things to do – to forgive those who have hurt you.  

To offer forgiveness to our offender means to receive inner healing for ourselves. Forgiveness and healing are intimately related. Here is the connection: The power of offering forgiveness, whether deserved or undeserved,  is the power that heals the heart of the one who forgives.

When we choose (yes, it is a choice) to forgive it releases us from the chains that bind our hearts, our minds and our bodies to pain. Choosing to forgive opens our heart’s door to inner peace.  Forgiveness can truly soften your heart and create peace within your body, mind, and spirit. Forgiveness can radically shift your relationship with food if you eat as punishment towards someone who has hurt you. Forgiveness can and will free you on an emotional, mental, physical, psychological and spiritual level (it’s been scientifically proven that harboring anger and resentment can increase your risk for cardiovascular issues; article from Journal of the American College of Cardiology HERE).

Forgiveness heals the body, mind, soul AND belly.

One of the most powerful tools for true healing and releasing resentments or negative emotions is forgiveness.  There is neuroscience proving that forgiveness is one of, if not the most powerful tools for mental transformation. 

When you forgive yourself and others, when you allow yourself to replace pain or guilt with acceptance, you can experience peace in your heart, mind, body and soul.

Forgiveness may seem impossible; maybe even inconceivable to those who have suffered at the hands of someone’s abuse, anger, neglect or unjust actions.  I can totally 110% understand this as a natural human default.

However, the only way, in these cases, to forgive is to choose to forgive. You don’t have to feel anything, in fact, most likely you will never feel like forgiving.  What I found works for me is to do this exercise and to mentally send that person who has wronged you pure love. 

Anytime you think about the painful or stressful situation, take a deep breath and just realize that we are all doing the best we can at the level of consciousness and awareness that we are at.  Focus on being grateful that you are learning and/or have the capacity and desire to forgive and move on. Because by forgiving, you heal.

There is a Hawaiian technique that can truly heal your heart called Ho’Oponopono.  This is a powerful and transformative exercise that you can do for 30-days that will radically and profoundly shift you on a cellular level if you really, really commit to the practice.  You can do this to yourself, for the mental, physical or emotional abuse from food, or any other substance.

You can do this to someone who has wronged you so that you can be free from the toxic energy of holding onto and harbouring resentment.  Clients who have done this for 30-days have witnessed the power of this way to release anything that you are holding onto that no longer serves your higher purpose (which BTW ages you profoundly so from an anti-aging perspective, do this).


  1. In a quiet space, sit in a comfortable position and think about the loved one or person who has hurt you, anyone you feel out of alignment with. 

  2. You simply repeat four powerful phrases to that person:  

    I’m sorry.

    Please forgive me.

    Thank you.

    I love you.

  3. Visually and/or out loud, repeat this over and over again with meaning to this person until you no longer have ill feelings towards this person.  

  4. When the healing is complete, have a discussion with that person and forgive them, and have them forgive you.  

  5. Now let go of that person and see them floating away from you.  As you watch them floating away, visualize yourself cutting the negative, toxic cord that attaches the two of you together.  

  6. Do this with every person in your life with whom you are in disagreement with or out of alignment with.  The final test is to see if you can think of this person without feeling any negative emotions.  If you do, then repeat the Ho’Oponopono until you do not.  This is your path to freedom, forgiveness, and a positive relationship with food when you do this to yourself, for yourself. 

We all have emotional and mental baggage about certain family members, friends, loved ones and others.  Focusing on that person or event with whom you desire healing while repeating the four phrases can open your heart and soften the feelings and emotions tied to the pain you are experiencing. 

This powerful technique is based in the philosophy of taking total responsibility for your actions as well as how you react to others. When you show up in the world, strong and present, you heal your wounds of the past in the process.  You also set the stage for others to follow your lead.

Ho’Oponono has no room for the ego.

By letting go of who’s right and who’s wrong, you start to develop a deeper connection to yourself while clearing the painful debris of the past.  Let go of the need to be right, let go of feeling victimized, let go of holding onto “your story.”

Forgiveness is a selfish but healthy way of letting go of baggage that is weighing you down emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually. 

Let go.


This includes forgiving yourself which can be the first step for many of us to truly start our internal healing journey. Remember, you are exactly where you are supposed to be (but don’t have to stay here) and you are doing the best job that you can at the level of awareness that you are at (that can continue to evolve and flourish). Forgive. Forgive. Forgive.

Take a deep breath and repeat…. 

I am sorry.  Please forgive me.  Thank you. I love you.



Your wound is probably NOT your fault. But your healing is YOUR responsibility.